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Friday, 31 October 2014

TGIF! FAYOSE TO REV UP YOUR SOCIAL QUOTIENT

Newly sworn in Ekiti State Governor,Ayo Fayose is always quick to prove his humility. The people's governor reveals that his favourite hang out every friday night is a local beer parlour,where he's free to hobnob with the common man. Isokay! Your excellency sir,are you sure these commoners want to remain common? What if they are sharking beer with you because you are capable of changing their present status? Na kwenshun I ask o. By the way,this food nor look bad at all. See as e dey enter throat. Bad for my diet. #runs out of post!

BREAKING NEWS:BURKINA FASO'S LEADER RESIGNS

After 27 years in power,Blaise Compaore has resigned as President of Burkina Faso. He was forced out following a violent uprising by the people of one of Africa's poorest Nations. ...who could he be looking at with "bad eye"?Zimbabwe's Robert Mugabe? Or Paul Biya of Cameroon?

GAY ALERT!

Apple CEO,Tim Cook,has boldly come out of the closet. Hear him,"Let's be clear: I'm proud to be gay, and I consider being gay among the greatest gifts God has given me."
Bwahahahahahahahahahaha can't stop laughing.

POLITICAL NOSTALGIA


video

In my arrogant opinion, this political Jingle,"on the march again"remains the best ever! Watch...

IHEDIOHA ROPED WITH TAMBUWAL

DEPUTY Speaker, House of Representatives, Honourable Emeka Ihedioha, appears to have landed in trouble, for hosting the Speaker, Honourable Aminu Tambuwal, to a reception, after the latter's defection to opposition All Progressives Congress (APC).

Sources in the National Assembly told the press that President Goodluck Jonathan and leaders of the Peoples Democratic Party (PDP) were angry with the Deputy Speaker for hosting Tambuwal to a warm reception, few hours after the Speaker defected from Peoples Democratic Party (PDP) to APC. A classic case of the friend of my Enemy is my Enemy.

PICTURE PERFECT

She loves pictures! She loves make up! She loves being on TV! She's not...me. She's Toke Makinwa!

MISS GENNY DOES ANKARA.

It's no longer News that Genevieve has resuscitated her on and off fashion line. St Genevieve label makes contemporary designs of female dresses and tops. I Don't Recall seeing Ankara among the lot,but this photo posted by her on her twitter handle may come in handy for those who are unsure of what to do with that "Aso~Ebi"sitting in a corner. She says they are her favourite native collection. If Genny is your favourite, go ahead and steal styles o. No dulling!

Thursday, 30 October 2014

MUBI ON FIRE

The dreaded Islamic sect, Boko Haram, has launched fresh attacks on Uba and Mubi towns of Adamawa State, killing many people, setting ablaze vehicles, houses, as well as displacing soldiers.

A resident of Mubi town, Dauda Ishaku, who is currently seeking refuge in Yola town of Adamawa State, told the Nigerian Tribune that the battle was fierce, as he feared many soldiers might have been killed.

He said they heard the rumour that the insurgents were at Uba town and thought that with the presence of the military in Mubi, there was no way they could come round, "but we were shocked when we were informed that the insurgents had driven out soldiers from Uba and were heading towards Mubi.

"By the time we were set to leave, they were already in Mubi and engaged the military in fierce battle. They were chanting "Allahu Akbar, meaning Allah is Great.

"Some of the people who saw them said they were telling the people not to run away, as they are after soldiers only, but they still killed civilians.~culled from Nigerian Tribune.

COSSY'S ENORMOUS POTENTIAL.

The actress and Singer is Hugely Talented! Cossy is expanding her resume in entertainment by busting the limits and boundaries of that sector . There's no confining her Gigantic skills!She can't be restricted! Try this for size; Her latest effort with singer, Trista, is recording maximum hits on Youtube. People are always drawn to Cossy. That's what you get when you put your best foot forward?* RME.

2014 VOYAGE OF CHIKA IKE

 
Delectable Actress Chika Ike has been trending lately. Its her annual holiday season. Followers of the divorced actress, have been tripping over her grooves in Tourist Destinations of Dubai and Turkey. As we have seen from the last 2 vacations in 2012 and 2013, it gets bigger and better,with thousands of dollars expended to provide maximum enjoyment for the part time Abuja based Business woman. As her holiday winds to a close,she tweeted this message to her fans. "Breakfast is served!!!! I've been indulging and cheating on my diet. I've put on some weight and I need to hit the gym ASAP!!i need a fitness trainer.". Ok! Personal trainers out there, there's money to be made. Find a way to sos your CV, complete with images of your Muscles, to the rich and famous Ms Ike. Thank me now!

DIEZANI ALISON-MADUEKE'S ABDUCTED SISTER RESCUED BY THE POLICE.

After 8 agonizing days in captivity, Petroleum Minister, Diezani Alison-
Madueke's sister, Osiya Agama, who was whisked off to God knows where
by unknown gunmen in Port Harcourt last Tuesday,
has been rescued.

Reports say that she was rescued by police on
Wednesday.

State Police Public Relations Officer, Ahmad
Mohammad, confirmed the rescue via the following
text message:

"This is to inform you that Osiya Agama has been
safely rescued during a joint operation by the police, military and the State Security Service. Two suspects
were arrested."



PORTION CONTROL AS DAMAGE CONTROL IN THE BATTLE OF THE BULGE.

 
Kudos to Society and Health experts who have succeeded overwhelmingly in their campaign\research that a slim svelte figure,not only prolongs our stay on this planet,but earns us the much needed 21st century major requirement for beauty. We all want to be admired. If you think you can't be bothered,then you most certainly are good looking. Anyone who's been "discomplimented"(where did I get this word na?), never wants to feel that low again, even if you have to be aggressive to avoid a recurrence. So, everyone, regardless of Age,Sex and Status, aspire to stay Slim, become slim,or fight to remain like some of us who are borderline plus size, often referred to as "average"(Nigerian term for those who are *just there*). Infact, It's a daily struggle to be "normal". Many of us have tried healthy and often times, dangerous remedies and diets to achieve that great body. Don't even get me started on the gym membership that were never renewed. Who else purchased slimming kits from pyramid schemes? I still have my fair share of Forever Living Milk~Shake meal replacements. Mind you, I tend to make a cuppa every other fortnight when I spot it by chance
 My money must not waste! Then the worst option world~wide: starvation! Christ! Painfully Skipping breakfast for weeks, only to begin to force same down your throat after you learn that the first meal of the day actually helps you lose weight by kick starting your metabolism.Choi!See me o! My breakfast is at 1pm, as I awake fully by 11am (Nocturnal topic in view) on a good day. Ok. Let's skip lunch then. After being constantly famished,everyone notices your newly acquired curves. Celebrations are in order. The party extends by a few more days. Without meaning to,you return to old habits! Oh no!!! On the other hand,If you were strong enough to have stayed loyal to your anorexic regimen,ulcer would have set you back many leaps!Complete with a major stop over at the health center for antacids. Na so! Let me not bore us further. I've found what works. Simple and breezy! Quick and painless! Portion Control. Flex your will power for this one. All you need do is eat a little of everything in a healthy manner. As the theme implies, a balanced diet in small portions! Note that the meals in this post were eaten by yours truly. #Rolling my eyes. No o! I didn't consume all u see. A bit of this, a bit of that and I had a kid's meal. A regular 6 year old kid's serving. Was I satisfied? Oh yes! After drinking water before and after the meals I felt fulfilled.
 The Only difference is unlike before, I didn't prolong the pleasure on my tastes buds. We actually do not need more than half of what we eat. If you think about it, most people eat out of duty.The food is there, this size was given to me, I must clean the plate in gratitude. No you don't!No I won't! Its been working for me.Slowly yet; Nonetheless I'm winning.I may never be very slim, but "average"?
I can live with that. They say its a fight for life. Indeed!